By 40, for every feel-good story of the sacrificially kind, altruistic, good samaritan, whose generosity helped someone else get back on their feet and rebuild their lives; we've heard a cautionary tale of a person who also tried to be kind, and tried to help someone in need. Often a friend, a family member, a neighbor, a romantic partner, or a co-worker. Only to have their entire life turned upside down - or worse - by the very person who desperately needed and accepted their assistance.

This stage of life is a good time to ask some questions about how we've come to think about helping others.

Who do you help?
When do you help?

What prompts you to help?
How do you help?

In what ways will you not help?
Has the range of moments - and/or people - you're open to help changed over the years?
What crosses the line from help to enabling/weakening?

When do you ask for help?
How often do you allow yourself to receive help?


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