There are many problems inherent in combining a business and personal relationship. The problematic areas usually revolve around money, respective effort, communication, ability and division of labor. There are other possible problems, but these are a few of the key categories.

In a combination business and personal relationship, it is helpful to reinforce each other in positive ways, such as verbal acknowledgement of each other’s effort, i.e. compliments. It’s important to reinforce each other on a regular basis. You cannot assume that your partner knows that they are appreciated in their efforts and hard work. It’s important that the compliments be voiced.

We discuss who is responsible for specific activities relating to the business, and we apportion activities according to ability and time availability. In our relationship, one of us has a larger part in running the business with all that that entails. We often strategize together on how we want to move forward on various pieces of business.

There are many other factors that are important in keeping a business and personal relationship strong and positive. Here are a few of them:

Being respectful of the right time to interact without disrupting what the other person is involved in.
Speaking and listening in a respectful way to each other. It is important to keep an open mind and the possibility of changing one’s mind.
Here’s a poem that Shelley and I would like to share called: “Listening”…

“Listen to me, I’ll listen to you.

It shows respect, and kindness too.

Listen with patience

And think of the other,

Like the sweet understanding of a loving Mother.

So let us be kind,

And patiently give,

The great gift of listening,

To compassionately live.

So, it is important not to interrupt, and to be a patient, present listener.

In connection with either party speaking, it’s important to be respectful of the other’s time. It’s also important in terms of time to “be sincere, be brief, and be seated”. We should not lecture, talk down to, patronize or blame. All of the above simply means not insisting on being right.

The guiding principles when business and personal relationships are combined, work best when patient communication, kindness and compassion are manifested. A key to make it all work is verbally appreciating and acknowledging the efforts of each person. The Buddhists say “We are all suffering”. We all have a bit of reactivity from our past. So, in this relationship there are ups and downs, successes and failures, worry and anxiety and all the negatives that exist in many relationships.

Summing it all up, patient, loving kindness to each other, being good listeners, and perhaps most important being good forgivers is what has enabled us to stay together in a combination business and personal relationship.

air date:2/17/17