Before famed musician Steven Seagal committed his musical genius upon the world, you may be surprised to learn that he also was an actor in action films like Under Siege, Hard To Kill, Above The Law, and On Deadly Ground. You may also learn that he was formerly a Navy SEAL, a CIA agent, and an Aikido master. (You will likely know this because he's made mention of it any and all chances he gets.)

It's shocking, but all true! Before the subject of reality TV show Steven Seagal: Lawman decided he had blues he needed to let free, he had a long and storied career in direct-to-home-video show business, but thank goodness he settled into music. Otherwise we might have been denied his opus, 2005's Songs From The Crystal Cave. A mish-mash of middling white guy blues, confusing spiritual themes, and some of the clumsiest takes on world fusion you may ever hear in your life.

On this episode of Jukebox Zeroes, Lilz and Pat are joined by Mario Boiardi of Horsehands and The Band Dennis for a deep dive into the dojo, and a tortured listening of Songs From The Crystal Cave in its entirety.

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